


In Which Elrond has a Birthday And Aragorn Gets a Present

by ineptshieldmaid



Category: Lord of the Rings (2001 2002 2003), Winnie-the-Pooh - Milne
Genre: Crack, Gen, Parody
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-08-05
Updated: 2008-08-05
Packaged: 2017-10-10 17:43:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 468
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/102380
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ineptshieldmaid/pseuds/ineptshieldmaid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's a special day, but Elrond isn't disappointed, not at all</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Which Elrond has a Birthday And Aragorn Gets a Present

**Author's Note:**

> A parody written many years ago (under another name) for a contest at ringbearer.org

    'Pathetic,' said Elrond. 'That's what it is, pathetic. Mind you, it's not as if I had any use for that sort of thing- gaiety, song and dance and so on. We can't all,' he said, 'and some don't. Not that it matters.' He started off into the distance gloomily. 'I couln't expect them to remember. After all, the enemy is moving. The blood of Numenor is all but spent. The dwarves care for nothing but riches. Why remember my birthday? Pathetic, that's what it is.'  
    There was a crackle in the leaves nearby, and Arwen came running into his pavillion.  
    'Tell me where you have been!' she cried.  
    'Nowhere,' he said. 'As usual.'  
    'You know what day it is. Where have you been?'  
    'You needn't bother. There is no future- only death.'  
    'There is also life,' Arwen insisted. 'Ada, how can you ignore a day like this?'  
    'Well,' Elrond said at last, ' alright then. Just don't blame me if it rains.'  
    'Silly old elf. There must be a wonderous gift...' she stared off into the distance.  
    'You don't have to.' Elrond was trying very hard to be modest. 'But as you did, I must say, late is better than never. I don't want anything flashy, mind you. I can't abide all this fuss and bother.'  
    'Reforge the sword.'  
    'Sorry?' he shook his head. 'I think I misheard you.'  
    'Reforge the sword of Elendil. Let it be our gift to him.'  
    'To who?'  
    'To Aragorn, of course! Today, he rides toward Gondor, and his birthright.'  
    Eldrond shrugged. 'I might have known. Not that it matters. I have my friends. Just the other day, Glorfindel bumped into me and said "Bother!". The Social Round. Always something going on.' Glancing down, he noticed that Arwen had swooned at his feet.  
    'I knew something like this would happen.' He took her hand. 'The life of the Eldar is leaving you. Next thing we know, it'll be raining.'  
    Arwen looked up at him. 'Ada, there is no ship now that can bear me hence.'  
    'Hmph.'  
    'Father... take the sword to him.'  
    'This kingship buisness,' Elrond grumbled. 'Swords and whatnot. Over-rated, if you ask me. Silly stuff. Nothing in it.' But he agreed in the end. 'Only don't blame me if it rains,' he warned.  
    It didn't rain, and Aragorn received the sword, and it all came out All Right in the end. Which is just how it should be.

Other Titles in the series:

*In which we are introduced to Frodo Baggins and some hobbits, and the story begins.  
*In which Samwise meets a heffalump.  
*In which Saraman is entirely surrounded by water.  
*In which Gandalf has a busy day and we learn what Denethor does in mourning.  
*In which Bilbo and Frodo come to an enchanted place, and we leave them there.

**Author's Note:**

> (no, the other titles don't exist, sorry!)


End file.
